One week.

It's been one week since Jude was born. One week.

One week of...

Joy

Sorrow

PRAYERS

Smiles

Tears

Pain

WAITING

 Laughter

Excitement

Encouragement

Nerves

Longing

Happiness

Exhaustion

PRAISE

Thanksgiving

Anticipation

Disappointment

Blessings

Frustration

Gratefulness

Miracles
Trusting

LIFE.

We love you precious boy. You are one week closer to HOME.

Introducing... Jude Ellis

We are thrilled to welcome our 4'th son...

JUDE ELLIS

March 21'st * 4:37am

3lbs 8oz * 16.5in.

Perfect.

A little about his birth...

Wednesday I celebrated 30 wks of pregnancy. I was not feeling well at all. I thought I was probably coming down with a stomach flu. My stomach felt a sharp pain like I had been hit or punched and I was vomiting as well. It wasn't that unusual for me to be feeling the nausea but the pain felt different than the contractions I was used to. I spent the day as I spent every day... in bed laying down and resting. My stomach was tight and felt hard, again I assumed it was a tummy bug hitting me so I just kept trying to drink water and rest. It wasn't unusual for me to feel so uncomfortable so I tried not to get too worked up over it. I was in quite a bit of pain and that night I was having my usual contractions that were painful but nothing shocking. I decided to go to bed and see how I felt in the morning. I went to sleep around midnight and tossed and turned until about 2:30am when I knew something was wrong. The contractions were extremely painful and I could no longer sleep. I went to the bathroom and I immediately knew something was wrong. I was bleeding really badly. I woke Nathan up and told him to hurry and wake the boys we needed to get to the hospital. We called my parents to come get the boys, and we called some Missionary friends who speak spanish and would be able to help with the boys until my parents arrived.

We got there pretty quickly and they had me put on a gown and lay in a bed while they called my doctor. My mind was racing and I started to panic. I still felt him moving and I kept rubbing him and waiting for him to respond. I am not sure how long it took the doctor to arrive the whole night turned to a blur. She got there and checked me and confirmed I was in active labor. She told me she needed to do an ultrasound to confirm his position because she felt a hand. They rushed me for an ultrasound and sure enough, Jude was laying transverse. I was still bleeding very badly and his hand had already presented in my cervix. She quickly went over the options with Nathan. 1.) Have a c-section there at the private hospital and Jude would need to be transported shortly after birth or 2.) Transport me to the public hospital for my c-section and then they would take Jude to the NICU.

We decided to stay for the C-section at the private hospital because we knew the care would be better. We also knew at the public hospital there would be a really strong language barrier and I was frightened enough. They rushed me up for my C-section and at 4:37am Jude arrived. I waited for his cry and breathed a huge sigh of relief when I heard it. I could see them working on him and pumping his chest and they quickly rushed him out of the room. He was taken by ambulance a few minutes away to the public hospital. I was in a fog.

Jude started out in very serious condition, but he has quickly shown us that he is very strong and he is a fighter. He is currently stable and doing well. While I wish he could have waited another month or two before joining us, I am so incredibly thankful he is here and he is safe and he is thriving. God is GREAT, and we are once again blessed with another son. 

We chose the name Jude because it means "Praise" and words can not express our praise and thanksgiving for our precious new son. His middle name, Ellis, means "The Lord is my God". We thought that fit perfectly. We have no doubts that God will watch over him and use his life as He sees fit. 

^" For this child I prayed, and the Lord has granted me my petition which I asked of Him."

1 Samuel 1:27

Planning.

I think it's safe to say I REALLY need to give up with planning. You would think I would have learned this several years ago when God first started really trying to get my attention. Nope. Instead, I decided that while I was willing to give up my plans and move forward with what we felt God wanted us to do, I would make new plans for once we got there. What can I say? I am a huge work in progress.

We found out we were expecting just a few weeks before we left for Panama. While we were very excited, I figured it would be a little challenging to move to another country with a baby on board.

The first 20 weeks I suffered from extreme "morning" sickness called Hyperemesis Gravidarum. Thanks to my weakened immune system I got pneumonia, then strep (for 3wks), then an upper respitory infection. That took quite a toll on "my plans" for getting settled and into a routine. After around 20 weeks I finally started feeling human again. I still suffered from morning sickness, but I was finally able to keep liquids and some food down. NOW we could get our plans back in motion. I already have blogged a little about our youngest son and some of the complications he has been having, and then the robbery happened and well once again my plans had to wait.

"God, can't you see I have some really great plans to fulfill?"

Around the 25wk mark in my pregnancy things started feeling off. Strong contractions, lots of cramping and low back pain, extreme dizziness and I started blacking out. I knew something wasn't right. About a week later I lost my mucous plug. Oh boy. We headed to the doctor and I told her what was going on. Sure enough, I had begun dilating and effacing and my cervix was very soft. "This is not good at all", my doctor said. "You must take this very seriously." She sent me for steroid shots to mature our little guys lungs, medicine to stop the contractions and then she put me on medicine every few hours to continue to take to keep the contractions at bay, and full bed rest.

Hmphhh. This was NOT in my plan. 

I am now 28wks along and baby boy is still right where he needs to be. I am hoping and praying he stays put for at least a few more weeks, but I am not planning on anything. He will come not a moment too soon. God already knows his birthday, and while I wish He would shed some light on that day for me, I know that HIS PLAN will be done. So whether this little one holds out until 42wks or if he comes tomorrow, I am excited to see what God has planned for him, AND... for me.

For now, I have plenty of time. Not to try and figure everything out, but to sit. To sit and listen. To pray. To be quiet, and to wait on the Lord.